2. But I had been on haywire since yesterday --- since I read your email --- and I just need a channel to vent out --- then why not write a blog?
3. After all, I've always thought that blogging is something that we both share --- or make that we both like. Makes me wonder have you ever read any of my blog?
4. Speaking of that email, imagine my surprise when I first read the sender's name.
5. And imagine my reaction when I read the message of the mail. --- I had a hard time concentrating on my next 2 calls --- alright make that 3.
6. It really got me thinking why was I included in the list of people you had sent it to.
7. And especially the part where my name was last on the list.
8. I was thinking maybe you were still in doubt whether to include me or not or maybe my name is really just simply last in your address book.
9. Then I thought it doesn't really matter as long as I was included.
10. Sorry, it means something to me.
11. It means a lot that I even replied on impulse.
12. Now, I'm wondering what could have been your reaction the moment you read my reply.
13. And I'm wondering if you are going to reply to my reply.
14. My email response is suppose to be 2 paragraphs longer --- but I omitted some lines. I tried to keep it short and simple.
15. I don't want you to think that I am too affected by your decision.
16. The truth is --- I am.
17. And I mean it when I said that somehow I regret that we never really had a chance to talk --- despite the number of opportunities we/I had.
18. I hate hate hate the awkwardness that we had.
19. I've accepted a number of invites thinking you'd be there and maybe we'd end up chatting or something since we're finally outside the work premise.
20. But it always ends up with you not being there.
21. Well, I know that your priorities had always been different from the rest of us.
22. But well again, there's just this thing called "taking chances."
23. I much rather have Kris Allen, Daniel Radcliffe or Mr. Darcy. But I much rather have you.
24. So yeah I do like you --- like more than a lot actually.
25. In fact I've created 3 blogs for you (this will be the 4th) and I've mentioned you in 11 of my blogs.
26. But then there was some time that I tried to deny it and even formulated my Top 10 reasons why I don't like you.
27. I told my friend Abigail about it but she did not believe them. Worse, she simply laugh it off. So I ended up not posting it.
28. Like I don't like our one and only picture together --- I look constipated. and the fact that you had it uploaded in one of your social sites makes it worse.
29. But I like the way you smiled in that picture. Maybe I am just really a hopeless romantic that I always thought you were smiling for the camera for me.
30. Which reminds me I still have two of your smileys that you had given me from our company smile campaign. I had it posted in my wall together with my "Today's Advice" poster. I regard that as a happy thought to keep on smiling.
31. So speaking of your smile, I actually like your dimple. I will always remember that elevator incident. I never thought I could make you laugh but I think I did. Although, I really feel stupid that day.
32. So yeah, maybe I still do like you. I am your official online stalker. --- I'm not sure if this is a bad thing. But yeah, I like looking at your profile pic.
33. But going back to your mail, I actually thought that maybe that's your way of saying: "Thank you that you had taken fancy of me but it's time to wake-up, it's over --- move on."
34. But I also thought that maybe that's your way of saying that you do appreciate my attention and that you do acknowledge my existence when all the while I thought you did not.
35. Since I'll never really know your reason I'll stick with number 34.
36. Now you might be wondering why I opted for 50. No particular reason. I was suppose to make this 100 since the amount of time it takes to get over someone should be at least one third of the time you were together (or in our case, "together"), which means more or less around 10 months --- that makes it more or less 300 days.
37. But then I thought there's really nothing to get over so why will I make it 1/3? I went for 1/2 of 1/3 instead.
38. I like you-- more than a lot.
39. I think that's the 3rd time I mentioned it here. I don't know, maybe I just want to set the record straight.
40. I never wanted to use the word love over you --- that's pretty scary.
41. So maybe it's a good thing that we no longer have a chance to work again together --- cause there's a possibility that it might go beyond like.
42. That line comes to mind again: I think that possibly, maybe I'm falling for you. Yes there's a chance that I've fallen quite hard over you. --- good thing nothing is ever certain. Thank God for possibilities.
43. I don't know but yeah I will miss seeing those set of jackets.
44. I will miss your messy-obviously-I -just-woke-up-kind-of-hairstyle.
45. I will miss those times that I'd like to think that you're overstaying in the pantry cause I am there too --- eating/ pretending to read the newspaper.
46. I will miss us being teased in the office as if we're an item.
47. I will miss your stingy smile.
48. I will miss you.
49. I wish you happiness and may you finally find your place in the sun.
50. Hope you'll keep in touch. ♥
1 comments:
was forced to comment. haha =p
Malcolm's line would come in handy. you should try blurting that out. in his face. waahhh! am still hoping for that #50 to become a reality, guess you really should. as chang and borgy said, some hints. won't hurt.
keep in mind though, you'll be happy soon!☺
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